JEALOUSY - October 26, 2013 - Inspiration from Source: This morning I was too tired to ask anything. So I asked, "what should we ponder today." I heard the word, "jealousy." Since I don't think I have much of a jealous bone in my body anymore, I was a little surprised. I love so much and love so many people, it is hard for me to get trapped in the "there can be only one" philosophy. 

I was jealous once upon a time - worse, I kind of wanted my partner to be jealous. In fact, I would guess that jealousy lost me some pretty great love - and I know that others' jealousy made them turn away from me. But something happened somewhere along the line and my love surpassed my need to be loved in return. My partnership became that - a partnership - our goal being that the other should be filled with joy. I stopped being jealous. We love each other so much, there simply isn't room for it.

As Robert Heinlein says in Stranger in a Strange Land, “Jealousy is a disease, love is a healthy condition. The immature mind often mistakes one for the other, or assumes that the greater the love, the greater the jealousy - in fact, they are almost incompatible; one emotion hardly leaves room for the other.”

The more I love, the less I seem to have room for jealousy. My joy at your pleasure, my joy in your happiness fulfills me. Sure, on occasion, I think, "wow, that's a nice car...might be nice to drive that..." Or, "boy, I wish I had a waistline like that." But I revel in your joy, and feel sadness if I see that you are not enjoying what you have created. Besides, I'm quite aware that if I really wanted to work that hard...I could get that car, or that waistline. 

This week I've been rather outspoken about my love for my dear besties from High School...."the boys on the wall". My love for them is incredibly intense. When I look at them I want them to be filled with joy, to live lives filled with success, with pleasure, with abundance. I want them to know without a doubt that somewhere in the world someone loves them without conditions. So - in front of my spouse - I tell them that. My spouse says, "me too!"

A few of my friends have said to me, "isn't your husband jealous about how much you love your old boy friends?" I literally laugh out loud when I'm asked if Gavin is jealous.

My response really is this - no, he's not jealous. He is happy. He knows that if we ever separate for whatever reason, he will always have my love. He knows it, because he sees it. I still love everyone I ever loved. I am not jealous that they are happy with someone else. I am pleased! We should all be striving for our greatest happiness, shouldn't we? 

And if I ever said I loved you. Then know that I still truly love you. My deepest wish is that you are happy whether I ever talk to you again or not. Believe me, the only reason we aren't talking - is because you don't pick up the phone, or text me on facebook - or (gasp) open the door for a face to face conversation. I love you. End of story.

So all my friends - know, that no matter where you go, and what you do - if I loved you once, you are unconditionally loved here - in my heart. If you need me to be jealous to make you happy - let me know. I'll pretend, if it will bring you joy. I'm an actress. You'll believe me. ;-)

Namaste.